As you all know I keep things very real and honest in my blogs and the statement above is actually something that came out of my mouth once!
My husband and I had been married for only a year when our beautiful baby boy came along and WOAH did his arrival rock our foundations! With the 8 year gap between my first and second, I really had forgotten how wild and uncontrollable your hormones and emotions are during, after and AFTER AFTER pregnancy!
I really didn’t mean to but during my third trimester and immediately after giving birth, I just couldn’t stand the sight of my husband! The poor man would have an ear full daily! Now hubby, is a man of not too many words, so arguments were always one sided and that pissed me off even more! Lol. In all seriousness, we really had to work hard not to kill each other and especially with the very serious condition of sleep deprivation! Truly, you never really know the effects of it until you experience it. Luckily, there is a lot of useful information and support out there on how to cope.
What really helped us, was to talk! We had to be honest with each other about how we felt and hardest for me, allow hubby to be involved and not control everything (my single parent hang ups)! Safe to say, we are so much better now and I love my best friend more than ever! Divorce is NOT on the cards!
As you will all know, marriage isn’t static and constantly needs effort from both sides. When it comes to being a married couple with children, that level of effort has to be on MAX! I’m not a marriage counsellor but I would really advice that you factor in ‘alone time’. It could be a date night, a walk to your local shop or just some time in the evening when you both sit, talk and LAUGH with each other; it is SO IMPORTANT!
Finally, let’s talk about sex! 😈 Research shows that many women experience a decline in their libido during and after pregnancy! If this is you, you are not alone! There are some things that you could try to get those hormones ‘riding’ again:
- Exercise some self-care! There is nothing sexy about hairy underarms and legs!
- Set the ambience. Have a friend or relative look after the kids. Purchase some lovely smelling candles from Bath and Body works…
- LIN-GE-RIE ladies…need I say more?
- Send random messages of endearment or other…
- Change of scene! There’s just something special about fresh hotel sheets that are neither poo or vomit stained!
If you have any other fail proof tips then please do share! 😁